This week’s blogpost is by guest author Chavisa Horemans, MES, CDC, CTRC. Chavisa is a trauma-informed consultant who experience and work focuses on helping individuals overcome gender-based violence and hidden abuse and providing a safe and empowering space to heal and recover from trauma. To learn more about Chavisa’s services you can visit The Mother Corp, or read further to find out more.
To enter parenthood, however you get there, is to enter uncertainty. 
We don’t know the little Being about to arrive. Whatever their unique needs, temperament, and health, we hope for the very best.
Sometimes, it seems that society sees parental leave as some pseudo-vacation from work when, in fact, the work is just starting. The physical and psychological toll of giving birth, the often abrupt hormonal shifts, the massive shift in routine, and the extended lack of sleep make it anything but a vacation.
I used to describe my baby years to non-parents as,
“Remember when you went out all night long on the weekends in your twenties, knowing you could sleep on Sunday? Sunday doesn’t come with a baby.”
Many of us go without sleep for extended periods of time. We go from an organized adult life to an amorphous, timeless year focusing on the rhythm of sleeping, ingesting milk, and pooping.
In most cases, a primary parent cares for the infant. Ideally, another devoted adult looks after the primary parent. Too often, this level of support is not in place. The combination of hormones in flux, emotions running the gamut, and insufficient wrap-around support creates the environment for post-partum depression. Primary parents need thoughtful, considerate support in an infant’s first year (and longer). Please seek help if you are contending with post-partum depression.
Financial realities also affect wellbeing during this time. The financial squeeze of a partial paycheck (or no paycheck) can put pressure on people during very vulnerable transition periods.
As a trauma-informed consultant, my practice is evidence-based. Data demonstrates that between 55% and 90% of us experience trauma. We experience three to five traumas during our lives, and we know some populations experience more trauma exposure than others. In light of this frequency, trauma-informed practices are increasingly growing.
My speciality is addressing gender-based violence. Women in Canada are more likely than men to experience violence because of their gender, with rates of violence being disproportionately higher for Indigenous women, queer women, trans and genderqueer people, and disabled women.
All too frequently, these trespasses occur in our childhoods and early adulthoods. Entering parenthood can cause us to stumble on, unearth, or contend with pre-existing trauma. This can impact how we give birth, how we welcome a child to our family, our ability to feed our babies, and our attachment and emotional experiences of parenting. Sleepless nights often stir up the subconscious and uncomfortable, unaddressed aspects of our lives.
I sought out certification in trauma recovery that is grounded in neurobiology and is evidence-based and focuses on spiritual and core trauma. The healing I’ve seen is profound. These core practices allow people to revisit their relationship to their physical and emotional health.
Parenting takes bravery. It is often semi-structured yet uncertain.
Trauma-informed support is becoming increasingly available as it is a valuable aspect amplifying all aspects of health and wellness.
I provide 1:1 trauma-informed coaching and consulting to individuals and organizations from a trauma-informed perspective.
Please feel free to check out www.themothercorp.com if you would like to connect. I look forward to chatting with you.
